ALL CRAPPY GIFTS

Emoji Poop Mini Waffle Maker

Officially licensed by Emoji, because somewhere a brand manager signed a contract to put their name on this. This 4-inch electric iron turns ordinary batter into a perfectly smiling, steaming pile of waffle, non-stick plates included so the horror releases cleanly every time. Works with any standard waffle or pancake mix, which means there is no ingredient list that can save you from what you are about to serve at brunch. Comes with a recipe booklet nobody asked for and a breakfast table nobody will forget. A whimsical novelty for kids, a minor act of psychological warfare for adults.